Underneath the Guise of Smile

In the cinema of my thoughts there is a movie playing about a tragic story of a girl. I think her name is Camouflage, she always walks around as happy as can be. She beams like rays of light..illuminating all that she comes across. To each person she gives a little candle for them to take as they continue on without her, so even when her light is gone then may still be able to see. This tragic girl goes through life loving, building, and reconstructing projects that she comes across. She's an engineer by trade. Every once in a while she has more projects than she can fit into her Joy to the World planner. She gets tired, but she smiles with bags under her eyes and moves forward. At the end of the day she is finally ready to rest. She sits down to eat, but no one has left any food for her.  She sees it as a mere oversight. She decides to go watch TV and then dumbfoundly looks at an empty space on the wall. “Damn the TV is gone!” She forgot she left it at a project she was working on. O well she thinks I guess I’ll just read…However, no one returned her books, ”I guess they’ll bring them back later” , she says. Finally she decides to sleep, that’s the one thing she can count on. As she prepares herself for bed she takes off her positive thinking cap, then she removes her bad day proof smiletastic 2011, and finally she changes out of her confident suit. There sitting on the bed she catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She surprises herself, she had forgotten what she looked like without her disguise. She goes to bed weeping for the emptiness she feels inside. It hurts in a familiar way, because she goes through this every night. This is the time when she is alone and all her stuff is gone and unlike everyone else she can’t see her own light. There's only darkness around. Right before she drifts asleep the shadow of her positive thinking cap pokes her in the eye. She looks at her bad day proof smiletastic 2011 and thinks "Let me just go to sleep, I have a lot of work to do tomorrow." All of which she does underneath the guise of smile, while she gradually dies inside. The movie makes me sad for Camouflage, I don't like the ending.