If Only He Had a Brain....

Sorry SNTCC it’s been a while, but as time passes and seasons change the adventures continue with the same ole lames. Have you ever dated a guy who was dumber than you? Were you astonished at his lack of wit? Did you revel in the time it took him to complete a thought? Have you ever been tickled at how long it took both of you to draw the same conclusion? Once upon a time….there was a girl who thought looks could save even the most mentally destitute guy. Us girls may even admit to thinking as long as his dick is big, I’m good.  ((sad face)) They don’t even make AC Slaters' like they used to (a nod to all my Save by the Bell people!!).  Nowadays they come dumb, inexperienced, not exciting physically, and lacking the traditional masculine qualities the story books told us to look for. I think L. Frank Baum was on to something when he wrote the Wizard of OZ. If we could find a man that comprised all of the attributes the male characters of that movie didn’t have,  then maybe the dating scene would be in better shape.  Can I get a number one:  with heart, courage, and BRAIN!!! Lol…

"Sure Thing"...

Today I met my Miguel, we had a love affair in the first five minutes we met..... I was a fein looking for a hit. He charmed me with his smile and fucked me with his eyes. His lips said they wanted to kiss me. I was completely down, hoping and praying he wasn't teasing me. His hands invaded my body, taking my nipples as hostages, forcing tongue filled kisses on them. I plotted my revenge on his tantalizing body. When he took his shirt off I licked the rolling hills of his valley. He treated me nothing like a friend, only like a lover who had been evading his attention. There was no mercy; he was proving a point with the tip of his penis. He was writing me a love letter explaining why I was fated to be only his in the end. My body was like clay and he was a demanding sculptor creating curves and pivots in the alleys of my pussy that had never seen company like his kind before. This love was a sure thing. The best thunderstorm my body had ever experienced, no need for an umbrella. He begged to feel every drop of rain. On a bad day he is my always in stock, elixir....curing my body of any tension that may reside between my pretty little legs. You can bet that, never gotta sweat that. Miguel puts that tension in its place every time. I quiver and drip re-living the flashbacks of the last time he left me paralyzed with pleasure....I hope I see him again, maybe this time we will actually speak.

Lovely Stranger

Lovely Stranger,

As I write you this melancholy melody I fight to hold the tears back, but in between breaths some still escape down the side of my face. Resentment leases my heart, where love used to stay. Who are you now; you are no longer recognizable to me by title or by face.

 Once upon a time you were the only one who really knew me, now you barely know my name. The person whose heart I chased after; anything to make you proud was my optimal ambition in life to sustain.

The characteristics I saw in you no one could ever live up to. I sulk in confusion, disappointing disillusion of who I used to know. In your words there was love, hope and comfort, now no longer adolescent I understand that words cannot be followed. Only the footprints of your actions should lead me to my conclusion of you.

 I can’t stop crying over the loss that I feel. It’s like you died but you are still here.  The decisions you made were not as they should have been, instead you did something different causing a butterfly effect tragic and lonely it seems in the end. Youthful joy and an elderly spirit cannot be protected now. You threw them in the midst of this unstable certainty; affecting their sense of trust and what they thought their lives would be. You perverted the roles in which we play; I hope it will all be worth it one day. When I look into the eyes of innocent smile, I am saddened because I see the desperation to hold on to something unknown that should be there, but instead we are left to stand-in.

Our relationship now is like keloid skin never truly healing within. What happens to the confused and disappointed faces; was the trade-off worth your selfish gratification? When you are not around there are times I forget you even existed; but then you appear and I can’t runaway fast enough from the memories you have awakened. I offer to help you with your bags, but when I turn to see how you are doing, I see that you are gone and you forgot all of your bags here with me. If foolishness is bound in the heart of a child, then I thank you for releasing me, my unexpected rod of reality. Now you are just a lovely stranger, an acquaintance with a charming smile who I feel like I knew in another lifetime. I constantly feel like you remind me of someone, but indubitably you are not that person.  You are just a lovely stranger that I care for.

What should we call a gypsy in its novelty form? When did this transition begin? When did the normalcy become too much for you to bear within? All my questions I need answers to, but I see no point in bothering you. My curiosity for the answers has faded as the years have gone by, the damage is done. I hope one day I will see you again with new eyes. It’s like we all have amnesia, can’t really remember right now what we used to be. I live now with photographs from the past of people I no longer see.

March: A Designer you should know...

With a label in his name sake only two years old, this Indian-born designer is taking the fashion world one stiletto at a time. Receiving minimal buzz in the main stream media until recently, Bibhu has been creating a cult of followers for years. Bibhu captures the delicacies of a woman’s silhouette. His evening wear is what he first became well known for in the beginning of his fashion career at FIT; Winning the prestigious Critics Award for Best Evening Wear Designer. Bibhu, after now becoming more popular because the cool kids will wear him, has debuted a nod to ClassicAmericana styling with his Spring 2011 (RTW…Ready-to-Wear) collection. Bibhu is well taught to do so, as he spent many years working under iconic fashion houses like Halston and J.Mendel (Respect!) before stomping out on his own. Since launching his label he has won awards like the Women’s Apparel 2010 Rising Star Award, from The Fashion Group International. In May 2010 Bibhu received the Young Innovator Award from the National Arts Club. In June 2010, Bibhu became a member of the Council of Fashion Designers of America. Now with the spotlight beaming bright on him, he has branched out distribution. You can find his looks online and at select boutiques around North America, Europe, Russia, and the Middle East. It is also available at Fashion Meccas like NY’s Bergdorf Goodman, and Neiman Marcus in various cities in the US. See below his Spring 2011 RTW looks. Label: Bibhu Mohapatra.

Quicksand

Your love is like quicksand, the more I fight it the more it draws me close.

Until it is finished with me I am helpless;  Your love is like quicksand, I’m getting too close.

I want to cum but I’m scared to, I’m way too in love with you. Your love is like quicksand.

The less I want you, the more I need you. You love draws me close.

Your rejection feels like discipline, fair but only for you. Your love is like quicksand.

Is it wrong for me to think about your embraces, when I lay in new places? Your love taunts me.

You’re the best thing I never should have done. Your love is like quicksand.

I yearn for your parts, and I cry because of our talks. Your love pulls me in.

All I ever wanted to do was stand with you, but quicksand you devour everything that comes near you.

I will never love another like I did you; No one will ever be able to get that close to me because of you. Your love is like quicksand.

You’re my sexiest fantasy, and the worst reality. Your love embarrasses me.

Memories of you make me smile…and then angry again.

You took it all quicksand, there’s no trace of me now;

I will always love you and hate you a little too within.

A Martyr by Any other Name is still Self-Righteous

As I have depicted many times before in my blog entries, there are soooo many characters one must familiarize themselves with in the DC metro area. Be careful who you let get close to you, as not everyone deserves to be in your presence. As Kanyvil so eloquently said, (Kanye West~ translation for my tighter laced folks :-) ) “My presence is a present kiss my ass.”…lol…but you get the point? The general ideology is that if someone is going to stand next to you, let them be well equipped to do so. You know that saying birds of a feather flock together? I just can’t fully endorse it. Where the cliché saying may be true in some regards, in other situations it could not be farther from.

Case Study: Today I wanted to highlight the Martyr. A Martyr is a person who is put to death or endures great suffering on behalf of any belief, principle, or cause; Or a person who seeks sympathy or attention by feigning or exaggerating pain, deprivation, ect. Do you know any Martyrs? ::: Warning ::: I’m about to get real philosophical for a second, stay with me! I wanted to raise remonstrate on the way we see a Martyrs in the 20-10s.

Analysis: I grew up like most of you thinking being called a Martyr was kind of a noble thing, more of the first definition, from what I had learned in school. However, while socializing in the D.C. I am meeting characters who too fit the definition of a Martyr, see provided above (more the second definition), but their “cause” does not seem so noble. Dare I say that A Martyr by Any Other Name is still Self-Righteous? I kind of feel that some people make their opinion, needs, wants, and desires…hopes, dreams, and wishes more important than other peoples’. So when put in social situations they almost take a stance of an elitist, looking down on your feelings, thoughts, and decisions. The question is why? I understand the need for confidence in the direction they have chosen to take their lives in, but then why do they constantly seem in competition with others around them?

William Shakespeare said in Romeo and Juliet that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. Meaning that the names of thins do not matter, only what things are. With our Neo-Martyrs this concept cannot really be applied. Why would they hold themselves so high up on their imaginary pedestals and yet compare themselves to those below them? They defy the Law of Identity, which states that an object is the same as itself. They embrace the Principle of Contradiction, rather than Aristotle’s Law of Non-Contradiction. Where one should not be able to say of something that it is and that it is not in the same respect and at the same time. They Live in the Law of the Excluded Middle. Meditating their thoughts on “cause” worthy ambiguous claims against themselves. Or forming Non-Webster dictionary meanings for words, that they will use to strengthen the piercing sound of their battle cry for their self-righteous “cause”.

Martyrs of today, have a false dichotomy personality. They cannot separate their life experience(s) and or viewpoints from others, but yet and still compare themselves to their “oppressors.” They worship a logically false misguided truth. These Neo-Martyrs are fatally insecure and cannot be trusted with your prize possessions, like your feelings or even your personality. It is my recommendation to keep them at a safe distance.

Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
Author Unknown

Underneath the Guise of Smile

In the cinema of my thoughts there is a movie playing about a tragic story of a girl. I think her name is Camouflage, she always walks around as happy as can be. She beams like rays of light..illuminating all that she comes across. To each person she gives a little candle for them to take as they continue on without her, so even when her light is gone then may still be able to see. This tragic girl goes through life loving, building, and reconstructing projects that she comes across. She's an engineer by trade. Every once in a while she has more projects than she can fit into her Joy to the World planner. She gets tired, but she smiles with bags under her eyes and moves forward. At the end of the day she is finally ready to rest. She sits down to eat, but no one has left any food for her.  She sees it as a mere oversight. She decides to go watch TV and then dumbfoundly looks at an empty space on the wall. “Damn the TV is gone!” She forgot she left it at a project she was working on. O well she thinks I guess I’ll just read…However, no one returned her books, ”I guess they’ll bring them back later” , she says. Finally she decides to sleep, that’s the one thing she can count on. As she prepares herself for bed she takes off her positive thinking cap, then she removes her bad day proof smiletastic 2011, and finally she changes out of her confident suit. There sitting on the bed she catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She surprises herself, she had forgotten what she looked like without her disguise. She goes to bed weeping for the emptiness she feels inside. It hurts in a familiar way, because she goes through this every night. This is the time when she is alone and all her stuff is gone and unlike everyone else she can’t see her own light. There's only darkness around. Right before she drifts asleep the shadow of her positive thinking cap pokes her in the eye. She looks at her bad day proof smiletastic 2011 and thinks "Let me just go to sleep, I have a lot of work to do tomorrow." All of which she does underneath the guise of smile, while she gradually dies inside. The movie makes me sad for Camouflage, I don't like the ending.

For Colored Girls...

When I saw this movie I did not recognize the reflection. It exposed the reality of what being a black woman really looks like, oppose to societies' funny mirror image of what the experience should be. The movie betrayed us, telling the audience our biggest secret. Rumors about how badly we want to be loved, but are rarely given the opportunity to experience it. We love on purpose and leave ourselves open on purpose.  

As black women we become friends with insecurity in early childhood. Insecurity tells us what we should expect from the world. Insecurity teaches us how to wear our disabilities of being black and a woman. Insecurity does not waste time telling us fairy tales, because they do not apply to us. Where is our knight in shining armor? Where is our happy ending? Do little colored girls get read "once upon a time" stories too, or is that just for Sondra, Denise, Vanessa, and Rudy Huxtable?

My love is too protected to really let anyone in. Don't let people continue to walk away with your spirit. The perpetual myth of what a black woman is, and the propaganda of what she should look like. How she will wage war on anything in her sight. She will definitely have an attitude, she must have a neck roll, and she will probably flare quickly or have a temper.

We top all statistics being most likely to have stomach cancer, diabetes, obesity, high blood pressure, to have HIV, and our babies are most likely to suffer from low birth weight or even infant mortality. Where are the statistics stating what we are more likely to excel at due to our complexion?

Why are we feed the shattered glass pie? We are expected to be strong women. Only positively known for being optimal nurtures, cooks, and strong matriarchs of our families. Yet and still the world does not know...we are much more. I think the key is to first recognize what the world wants us to believe about ourselves and not be offended by it. Take pride in showing all who we really are. We should not be scared to be vulnerable. Fear is what allows us to lean on our negative stereotype. F@#! society and the role they want us to play...do it only like you can and reshape the way the world sees you. Not for them, but for yourself, because that is where our generational healing will really begin.

February: A Designer you should know...

The Addison Story (TAS) is an up and coming line for the young woman whose style is Romantic, Minimal, and Street. It is quite diverse and offers pieces that represent the culture of the East Village, NYC neighborhood the designer is from. The Addison Story is the brain child of Parson's Graduate Amy Hsiung. This design house speaks to me as a person who literally decides what I'm going to wear when I get to that part of my morning regimen. With key pieces from this line you are afforded the wardrobe to showcase your versatile self! The full company website will be available by the end of the month. TAS is currently sold at Neiman Marcus. If you spot it anywhere else it me know!! Warning fashion below!!

Cotton Candy Surprise!!!

"So yea he's kinda cute, I'm feeling him.....I think I will give him my number. Maybe we can get together Saturday night." This is the thought process when you lay eyes on a handsome young twenty something in the D dot C (D.C.). The week goes on; you catch yourself fantasizing about him a few times. Wondering things like.....was that a bulge in his pants or just a poor tailoring job? What was he drinking again....Hennessey, I think it was on the rocks!!...he must be a really bad boy wrapped up nicely in a gentlemen’s bow. You of course being a woman, flirt with the idea of that first date leading to a relationship and the passionate kisses in the embraces you two will share. And then you get a text??!! ...What are you doing Saturday?..lol...Its him, Hennessey! You reply, Nothing, I guess I'm hanging out with you. He sends back …LOL :-) The smiley face reminds you of a Trey Songz's song LOL smiley face...is he a freak? After all the speculating you all go out and have drinks and dinner Saturday night. He's perfect!! He's got a good job, nice car, all his damn teeth, and his own place. You found the diamond in the rough. So when he invites you to come up to his place to watch a movie you see absolutely no problem with this. He's like Hennessey...probably trying to get a little kiss or something. The movie is great, but he hasn't tried to kiss you? hmmm that’s weird, but oh well.  You tell him your heading home and then he goes in for the kiss...FINALLY…masturbating material!...it was nice....As you start to walk towards the door he asks you if your leaving something behind. You turn around and your immediately shaken by the shoulders with the emotions of fear and shock. You say "Is that your DICK? Are you?...OMG...?!!" and He responds “Yea girl, come get this Cotton Candy Surprise!!!!” You walk out...."GROSS!!!" Those damn D.C. men!

Things that make you say hmmm...

Hello SNTCC bloggers. Recently I have pondered a new quander. Do people ever really take a good look at themselves? I know as women we are used to meeting guys who try their hardest to muster up their confidence or fake us out with their swag turned on 2%. Even when they know we are WAY out of their league. Those men by default should not be included in this conversation. As they are fully aware they do not meet the qualifications for the position, but they still want to apply for the job. They don’t lie as much as they just aim high, and use the tools that they have been given. Flavor flav??!!

Case study: I am talking about those skillful liars who believe their own faulty stories. They are the really sick ones...let’s call them Pinocchio’s and Pinocchia’s...Mugshot: they seem to lie for no apparent reason at all; And then when they get caught, they all of a sudden get this dumbfounded look on their face, as to say “You didn’t believe my lie too?” When these people lie its clear they believe what they are saying, so does this mean they think others believe them too?

What is a liar’s motive? What are they trying to prove? Do they just want to be real boys and girls like ourselves? Or do their lies just relentlessly bully them and force their way out of little Pinocchia’s mouth?.All of us who shine genuinely through and through must learn how to use the liar to our advantage. Generally, if the liar is on that Pinoccho or Pinocchia level, their memory is probably not very good. One might even say their minds often play tricks on them? No, less do not try and navigate through their webs. Note them, and keep it moving. It is not necessary to burden your intelligence with stories from those whose brain did not reach full development. Instead make it a mental sparing match! Help them create their web and marvel in how messy their workmanship is. Then poke a whole…be careful, as pinocchio’s are generally very sensitive, but poke that damn hole!! And enjoy...watch as the studied liar tries to aggressively clean up their mess. You could even throw them a raft that you know is de-flatting, it really only makes the show better for you. I guess to be really good liars they can’t look at themselves, because then they might turn to stone. @ My genuines..just laugh, life is too short to allow those who are too insecure to live life slow you down while you delight in yours!

Running out of Time

I am a lova of another. I have offered all and saved none for myself. I feel like I'm the creepy girl in the Ring trapped in the well. It should never be recommended to leave someone just because they are lacking. No one is perfect right? At this age a very important lesson is learned. Some people have the "perfect" relationships...something you would see on the office with Jim & Pam...or on the Cosby show with Cliff and Claire. Those people are very fortunate, but their plight may still end up the same.

 When you're in a relationship with someone who is lacking your first instinct if you love them, is to be there for them and cover them. Then...this is where love takes you to school....you realize that you are unhappy. How did this happen? You love the person so much? This happens for some because going into their relationship they didn't know who they were. Then once they have developed a sense of self or desires, needs, and or wants...their partners no longer can meet their needs and they are just stuck. Then there are others who know who they are, but pride themselves on being relationship philanthropists and they survive as "True Romantics" in spite of themselves. They call themselves seeing "potential", this equates to them losing a lot and not getting there needs met fully. As women we shouldn't be scared to ask for a fulfilling relationship....because men expect and receive one from us. Sometimes you have to purposely decide to love yourself as much as you love someone else. Play fair and communicate your needs! If your needs are not being met don't be afraid to let them know they are running out of time.

"Lend yourself to others, but give yourself to yourself"

Michel de Montaigne

Butterfly...

Now Twenty-six years young, I am starting to notice a trend amongst  my friends. Friends now do things like have a glass of wine with dinner, and other pinky figure up adult things of the sort. Now, I by no means think young people should not save for their retirement or plan responsibly for their futures.  However, these actions do not seem genuine, but instead like acts from a  play that their parents starred in.  I get we need direction, but as I mentioned in a previous post, does adulthood mean we have to let go of fun? Can't we have both? 

Just like a Butterfly we must all experience transformation

Maybe we have to  let go of who we were , to become who we will be?  But why do we act like we have no control of the outcome. Like the only option is to be boring. ...lol...If I take the blue pill as oppose to the red pill, will I have a more interesting life?  These are just questions??? I wanted to pose to you all. I have made my decision..I refuse to conform! I will  be a responsible adult and all that jazz ...but I will bravely cultivate  a life  that will not  sacrifice fulfillment  for a role in that reoccurring play.

Spring 2011 Vol. 1..

Although today we feel like we are very much in the middle of a snow tornado, we are only a few months out from Spring. Technically..flowers should be blooming and the rain should start on March 21st. With Groundhog's day approaching, February 2nd, I know I am not alone hoping and praying that  that damn brown furry looking thing does not see his shadow!..lol..anyway readers this is the first volume of fashion to covet for the spring. Please see eye candy below.

Pic: Marc Jacobs Spring/Summer 2011-Major trends this season include slits and big botanical hair pins.

Pic: Z Spoke by Zac Posen Spring/Summer 2011-Bright colors and mini crinolines

Pic: Rodarte Spring/Summer 2011- Long skirts and mixed patterns.

Trend Spotlight....Hair!

What is old is new again...Trends I am forecasting for this year were all rocked on the mane of this inspirational singer....

My favorite look for the year, a loose crimp 

Miss You...because you were One in A Million...

Sometimes when we move forward its good to take a look in the rear view mirror to see where we are coming from. Today was a.."Back in day ...when I was young, I'm not a kid anymore"... kind of day. I was thinking about what my next step would be in self discovery, and then I began to remember all that I had come out of and the dreams that I had purposely forgot about. I found a Resolution...I began to listen to the therapeutic melodies of R&B's late angel Aaliyah. I could not believe it had already been almost ten years since we said goodbye to her. I began to think about her career at the time of her passing. She was the "IT" girl, she was making black beauty commercial and irresistible. She was More Than A Woman...At the time of her passing she had already accomplished so much, but it was clear to all that she was just beginning to reach the true potential of what her career should have been. What if the cliche saying "Tomorrow is not promised to anyone" was true? What have I accomplished? Am I at a place where I feel like I'm reaching my goals? Today, looking back at myself ten years ago, at age 16 watching an Aaliyah video trying to figure out the choreography....re-focused me. It reminded me that back then, I realized that if a girl from Detroit could make the country fall in love with her, because of what she loved to do. That I too could do what I loved to do and be bold in it! So as we continue to move forward in another year, maybe we should think back to our Aaliyah days where we may have stashed some of our dreams away, and bring them back driving them forward into fruition...Because I Care 4 U, I'm going to remind you that At Your Best you are love and a positive motivating force....That is Hot Like Fire!!!

Fazhion Addict!!!

In this blog I would like to introduce a new topic of discussion for my fellow, twenty, thirty, etc. somethings...The website is my new fashion blog. On this site you will be able to find amazing designer pieces for affordable prices and see new/different trends transition from the runway to the street. Love or hate it there is a little something I believe for everyone. Visit the link below:

www.boutiques.com, search for: FazhionAddict.

I want to use this opportunity to introduce you to a designer you should know..

NAEEM KHAN


Naeem Khan (born May 21, 1958 in Mumbai, India) is an Indian-born, American fashion designer. He is the designer and CEO for Naeem Khan, which was launched in 2003. His designs have been worn by celebrities including Beyonce Knowles, Carrie Underwood, Eva Longoria Parker and Brooke Shields, and by First Lady Michelle Obama.


Ready to Wear Spring 2011 Collection:

oooooo aaaah!

One of the hardest things about being a woman is sex! A lot of women never get that weak in the knees lava everywhere type of intensity from sex. However, many women do... The myth behind the perfect orgasm is concentration. We  have to concentrate on our climax like we're trying to figure out a nutrition label on the back of a box Oreos.... Another thing.... we have to stop faking it..lol..,although it gives our men a sense of accomplishment, we're really enabling their bad sexual habits. Don't be lazy, if you teach them...you will cum!